


What's In A Name?

by CallToMuster



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Drabble, Gen, but i wish i could, i cannot take credit, what a great name for that gun
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-04
Updated: 2016-02-04
Packaged: 2018-05-18 03:07:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 711
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5895760
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CallToMuster/pseuds/CallToMuster
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>SHIELD struggles with what to name the Phase 2 Destroyer gun. Then, it hits them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	What's In A Name?

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [An Agent of Chaos: A SHIELD Codex](https://archiveofourown.org/works/3468455) by [KhamanV](https://archiveofourown.org/users/KhamanV/pseuds/KhamanV). 



> This is just a tiny drabble I cranked out in half an hour. I just read "An Agent of Chaos" by KhamanV and read something about 1/3 of the way down and inspiration struck me.
> 
> Happy reading!

“So, I was thinking,” Dr. Emma Phillips said aloud to her lab partner across the room. She was in SHIELD’s Research and Development laboratories, deep underground a secure facility. Dr. Ji Eun Han, said lab partner, flipped up her welding face mask and turned to her. Emma resumed. “24601-221B. It needs a name.”

  


Ji Eun clarified, “That’s the Phase 2 mega-gun, right?”

  


Emma nodded. “It needs a name, Ji Eun. We can’t call it ‘24601-221B’. Can you imagine what the field agents will say? I got enough flak for naming that rifle ‘deoxyribonucleic acid’.”

  


“Hey,” Ji Eun said and rolled her eyes. “They should’ve known that that’s DNA’s real name.”

  


“True,” Emma conceded, “but still. There’s gotta be a better name than that.”

  


“Well, why not make it a vote? That way no one can complain because it’ll be fair.”

  


Emma grinned. “I like the way you think!” Ji Eun smiled at her and flipped down her mask and lit the flame, sparks flying everywhere.

  


~~

  


The flyer went up in the mess hall the next Wednesday. “Email Emma Phillips at  [ drephillips@shield.gov ](mailto:drephillips@shield.gov) with your name suggestions!” it said in bold letters. A picture of the gun accompanied it. Overnight, Emma’s inbox flooded with names. They ranged from goofy (Mr. Cuddles) to frightening (KILLERZ) to just plain weird (XX-Star-Pickle). She let the contest go for a week or so, then, realizing she promised to have the poll up on Thursday morning (and it was already 11:42 pm on Wednesday, where had the time gone?) hurried to enter the names. Emma didn’t really look at them too closely as she did it, more concentrated with speed. 

  


Thus finished, she eagerly went back to the holotable and the design she left running. Emma quickly became lost in her work. So lost in her work that when Ji Eun tapped her on the shoulder, it was twenty four hours later. 

  


“Em, you might want to see this.” Ji Eun’s phone was shoved in Emma’s face. She blinked once, twice, trying to get the sleep out. As her eyes focused, she made out a name. No, multiple names. It was the poll! But what was that in first place?  _ Ahhh…  _ she thought.  _ That’s perfect _ . Her eyes shined.

  


Ji Eun gave her a wistful smile. “I know.”

  


~~

  


James Jamison (yes, it was a rather unfortunate name, he knew) was in charge of the armory at SHIELD, had been for the past 34 years, and probably would be for quite a few more. In his time, he’d seen many weapons pass through his halls. R&D’s reward for crafting a new gun was the right to name it. They relished this, coming up with obscure references and inside jokes to call the weapons. Occasionally, when they were really mad at the field agents, they’d name it something hard to say, like a tongue twister. SHIELD protocol was to always use a weapon’s name when referring to it, to avoid confusion. This made people mad. ‘Peter Piper Picked A Peck Of Pickled Peppers’ was a fantastic gun though (a breakthrough, really), so James didn’t grumble too much. The point was, James kept track of all the weapons in SHIELD. Some were dreadful, and he quickly got them thrown out. Some were fantastic, and he’d made sure they trained the junior agents on ‘em. But this one, this one was something else. It deserved a category of it’s own. 

  


He stared down at the form in front of him.  _ WEAPON NAME CHANGE _ glared at him from the top of the page.  _ 22601-221B to _ … James’s eyes pricked a little when he saw what followed. It was fitting. It was perfect.

  


~~

  


Nick Fury fixed his eye at the huge-ass gun in front of him. He read the nameplate, the gleaming chrome letters in sharp contrast with the shiny dark metal the body was made out of. A slow smile stretched across his face. Dark amber swilled around in the decanter he was drinking out of. Nick had dug out the good stuff this evening. He held up his glass.  _ Here’s to you, Cheese. _

  


Nick liked the name. He was the one to come up with it, after all. He looked down at the nameplate again. 

  
He read aloud, “ _Coulson’s Revenge._ ”

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah, I totally stole "Coulson's Revenge" from KhamanV's story. All credit goes to them for that part! 
> 
> Also, keep an eye out for my Russian!Phil story, coming soon!
> 
> Thanks again!


End file.
